eye opener.

hey friends. i've been super busy this week and have had no time for blogging. but i wanted to tell you some things before i headed out to the tenth avenue north show tonight at grace fellowship. :)

last night the guys and i had a worship meeting with one of our own who is getting deployed to Iraq. he leaves in a couple weeks for training, then comes home for a month or less, and heads out to the desert for six months. he has a wife and three kids, one of which is only a few months old. i love this brother dearly and i'm heartbroken to see him leave us, but at the same time i'm more proud of him than words can express. anyway, we were praying over him and his wife last night at their house and it just hit me that if this brother of mine can leave his wife and children and head straight into the face of danger and mystery, i should be able to do so much more than what i currently am with the life i live. does that make sense? it's kind of hard to put my thoughts from last night into words. but i guess i figured out by his example that i've got to straighten myself out and spend more time doing/saying/thinking things that MATTER. lately i've been tied up in a myriad of wasted emotions and exhaustion. while my brother is preparing for war, i've been preparing for virtually nothing. that's kind of what hit me last night. and in honor of him (and Jesus) and the sacrifice he's making, i want to change how i live. it's not that the way i'm living is bad per se, but my focus is rarely on the right things as of late, if i can be honest.

so these next six months and on while he's gone, i'll be changing while he is. hopefully both of us can change for the better and not backtrack. i know the Lord is firmly holding on to us and taking back what is rightfully His. even when we're slipping away, His grasp gets that much tighter and i'm so grateful for that.

and to my beloved brother..

you are so special to me and it breaks my heart that you have to leave us, but you are supposed to do this and you are covered in our prayers and love. we will be taking care of your family while you're away and lifting you up daily. God never lets an opportunity go to waste; He puts us in those situations and now it's up to you to show who He is in all that you do, even in a dry, hot desert with little comfort and being apart from all of us. i'm so proud of you and i know your children and wife are as well. this will be a hard six months but use that time to grow closer to God rather than fall away, and know that we'll be waiting for you with more love than you can ever imagine. in every worship set i do after you leave, i'll be thinking of you and missing you.

LOVE YOU!